The Drinking Club with a Running Problem
Hash Trash for Shanghai H3 Run #907
Sunday 6th August

Hares: Octopussy & Pavarotten
Venue: A to B. Suzhou Lakes, 'Bei Ma Jian' & restaurant in the park.

This was an out of town run and this group of hashers were happy to escape the city on a beautiful summer's day. The bus driver just wanted to bring us for a tour though - as he randomly chose roads, highways and whatever route that took his fancy. We stopped at least 3 times while he decided which way looked most interesting. Funny how Chinese drivers never bring a map along? We arrived at our destination hours later into the heat of another Sunday afternoon. The park for this trail was newly completed and it looked it. There was no litter and few people around. It was a landscaped dream, complete with bridges, paved pathways, gazebos and piped music coming from speakers disguised as rocks/tree stumps scattered around.
Forget the sounds of nature, Chinese squaky music is far better in the countryside - its necessary for a truly outdoor experience.

The run began from the entrance gate to the park and the runners went on on into the distance as the 4 walkers (Scribe included) marched on behind. It was a pleasant day's walk around this park and we spotted the runners more than once traversing bridges, climbing hills and descending, scattered around the hills. It was a relatively short run at 40 mins because the hares had set it the day before in 36 degree heat. Apparently both of them fell foul to hill holes whilst setting it, and so decided it was best to keep the pack away from such perils.
We circled up at a lakeside restaurant which was pleasant and a welcome break from the noise and crazy Shanghai streets.

The circle began with welcoming the newcummers of which all were female, N-N Carolyn from Southern California, N-N Helen from Shanghai, N-N Maria from Russia, N-N Eva from Shangdong Province and N-H Michio from Japan. We were all grateful at least that the RA didn't use his cue cards today and is slowly starting to remember his 'lines'. There was talk about impoverished expat's that could not afford a decent teeshirt like Pavarotten and Artsy, more victims were those who wore pink clothes after the haberdashery fuck up (the red changeover teeshirts that ran in the wash) Grasscutter, Camel, Mouthpiece, Pissucker,Pavarrotten and GM Octy. The hares were up again for getting lost on trail.
A very suspect photograph was produced of one hasher who is a victim of oppression - poor Camel was pictured wearing a very fetching pair of bunny ears which was evidence of his former life as a playmate. The GM called up a few of the scantily clad ladies to perform and show their assets off - Michimo was the clear and obvious winner - in fact everything about her was clear and obvious that day!

F.A. Duck and Pissucker were up for bringing performance enhancing equipment with them on this run - they had their water carrying back packs which contained everything but the kitchen sink - definitely cheating. And then Artsy was up for taking performance reducing substances all the time!! Two hashers were accused of being show-offs - Shagger and Mini Cock headed off for another jaunt around the park after everyone had gone on in to the restaurant - hey guys take a load off - its Sunday!!

The on food was western influenced rather than style and was edible - but it was the surroundings that made it enjoyable. This park was well worth the visit and its a given that the Shanghai H3 will be back in this neck of the woods for more runs!
We boarded the bus after much festivity and were entertained by the usual suspects that sang us most of the way home.

Any complaints about this hash trash should be sent to somebody else.

On On
Cums Inside
August 8th 2006